Today in one of my classes, I taught my students how to write thesis statements. It's an afternoon class, and the large room gets rather warm at that time. Even though the sunshine has to fight its way into the loft-like room, the warmth and spring-like atmosphere seep in, creating an environment more suited to daydreaming than studying. Birds are constantly singing in the windows and occasionally fly through the open windows on one side of the room, cross the room, and fly out the open windows on the other side. It's a struggle to keep students focused and motivated to write. And, really, how interesting is it to practice writing thesis statements? So, to keep them engaged, I ask students to give me topics that everyone will write about.
Me: "Someone give me a topic, any topic." (Birds chirping.) "Anyone...? Anyone...?"
Silence. More birds chirping.
Great. Here's your topic then: beauty pageants.
Stares.
"Staring at me is not going to help you write."
This has become my new favorite line in class. I'm thinking of taking it to the streets where I get stared at quite a bit, especially walking to and from work. "Staring at me is not going to help you drive, dude!"
My students take my new mantra pretty well and just smile sheepishly at me and then start writing. Today, however, one of the young men in class contested the topic.
Student: "But I don't like this topic. I don't know about this."
Me: "You can't write something about beauty pageants?"
Student: "No. This is about girls. I don't know anything about girls!"
Me: "Are you admitting in front of this entire class that you know nothing about women?"
He started writing.
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